Arguably the worst thing to happen in a parent's life is to lose a child to the Spirit World. It's heart-breaking when it happens, whatever age they pass, but especially those who pass at a very young age. My mother lost her first son, my brother, at just a few weeks old due to complications with his heart, and mistakes happening at the hospital that should never have happened. He would be 32 years old now, but still my mother grieves hard between his birthday and the anniversary of him returning to Spirit. One of the things she wanted to know when he passed, along with many other mothers and fathers, is what happens to their soul, do they continue to grow as people or do they stay forever as a baby?
I don't identify myself as a Spiritualist, for many complex reasons which I won't go into in this blog, however, I started my pathway as a medium in an SNU Spiritualist church (Spiritualist's National Union), and therefore I've been taught the traditional Spiritualist foundations, and one of the principles of Spiritualism is "eternal progress open to every human soul" (although, I like to reword that principle to read as every single soul, as opposed to every human soul). This means that every being that exists has the ability to learn, discover, grow and better themselves, no matter what, and this isn't limited to our physical world. When we pass over to the Spirit World we continue to grow and age. Don't panic - when I say age, I don't mean you'll continue greying and gaining thousands more wrinkles, I'm talking on a spiritual level. We become more wise and learned. This includes children who may have not touched the Earth, in cases such as still birth, miscarriage and abortions.
My brother, Sean, often visited my mother to reassure her that he was in safe hands and was well looked after, and after a couple of years he appeared as an 18 year old. He was growing as a person and receiving the lessons he wished from the Spirit World. He was allowed to be a child and have fun, and was brought up in an enriching environment. When we pass over into the Spirit Realms, we no longer have our physical body, we are just a non-physical blob of energy floating in another realm, this means that we can decide how we wish to look and appear to people. For most spirits, they decide to show themselves to be at the age they passed, or to be at the age when the person they are visiting knew them best (so definitely no extra wrinkles!). Of course, if they wanted to, they could come back looking like a super model, but when passing on a message through a medium, that could get quite confusing... Sean, however, decided he felt most comfortable being an 18 year old and has remained that way ever since. Whenever I've connected with him or I've visited him through a meditation, he always looks to be around 18 with better hair than me, and much better looking! What's that all about? I'm sure he's trying to wind me up... Despite his youthful appearance, if I ever go to him and ask him for advice, he definitely has the wisdom of someone much older, perhaps even more wisdom than a 32 year old would have, considering the abundance of knowledge and lessons he has available to him.
I'm used to Sean's presence now, and it's comforting to have his guidance and protection and his big brotherly care for me. Despite this, I still find it quite difficult when I'm giving a message to somebody from a young child who steps forward to communicate. I instantly know that they are young, as more often than not, all I can see of them is a bright, blinding light. This is their energy, and the brightness is due to their innocence and not having been tainted by the Physical World. There is always strong emotion, from both sides of life, when a child steps through. Even though I find the connection difficult due to the emotion behind it, I never neglect to pass on a message so I welcome that spirit with open arms. Most of the time when I'm giving a reading for someone, a spirit child will show themselves to me as either a baby or a young toddler. Again, this is so that the person receiving the message knows exactly who is communicating. Often, I will see a young toddler but get the sense that they're much older beyond their years and pass on the message to their parents left behind.
A recurring factor I've noticed with children from the Spirit Realms is mischievousness. No matter how much time has passed since they returned to the Spirit World, they always seem to retain their childish behaviour, and I've been told countless times from the spirit that they like to play haunting tricks on their family members. Keys go missing, things go bump in the night and electrical appliances gain a mind of their own, as these spirit children play naughty tricks to bring laughter and fun into the home. Parents often tell me they hear footsteps running backwards and forwards around the house as their child visits them. Although, I personally wouldn't want these ghostly happenings in my home, it brings comfort and joy to those I read for, to know their children are never too far away.
Even if a child passed to the World of Spirit as a baby, they may connect in as a toddler as this is a more comfortable image for me to communicate with, as a talking baby is a little bit off-putting... If they do wish to show themselves as a baby, often they come in with another loved one in the Spirit World carrying them in their arms.
Often, spirit children are cared for by our family members who are already on that side of life, or they may be looked after by a spirit nanny. There are people in the Spirit Realm who dedicate their lives to supporting and helping spirit children find themselves and grow and develop. A sort of Spirit Crèche. They are well looked after and in safe hands.
I may find the connection with a spirit child difficult, but that's nothing in comparison to the grief a parent feels from the loss of that child, but rest assured that they may not be here in the physical world any more, but their soul does go on and they are shining brightly in the Afterlife and keeping a close eye on you.
Credit: FreeImages.com. Pictures created by pascal79-37595 and Kylesatori-32077.